Just How Anxious Are You?

Recently I got honest with myself (I do this frequently but I tend to shy away from the deeper truths I need to ignore in order to fight another day). The true status of my anxiety and stress levels was one such truth I preferred to keep in a shoebox. Sealed. Buried. Ignored and disavowed.

Until the other night when I felt what it was like to occupy my body without anxiety and stress. 

This wasn’t a conscious choice, I didn’t set out to connect with anxiety (because it didn’t exist right?) the experience kind of...unfolded within me. I’d love to report it was a large shock wave of realisation and profound insight...but it was more...relaxation. 

*Gasp?!!* 

I’d relaxed before!
I know how to relax dammit!
I have a Netflix, Amazon and Redbull subscription ffs!
No... this was nothing like that. 

This was the by-product of a recent reestablishment of boundaries, saying no to a few individuals (legally), and accepting the fact that the ‘enjoyment’ and ‘nothing’ segments of my personal pie chart were equally important as 'work' and 'sacrifice'. 

I had no idea how much worry and anxiety my above list was causing until they were gone. How could I? Every aspect of our lives almost guarantees anxiety to some level or other. Even if your pie chart is glowing with perfection, that’s also a cause for anxiety, isn’t it?

What if it stops glowing?
How do I keep it safe? 

We know the impact of high stress and anxiety; sleeplessness, short tempers, difficulty building authentic relationships, inability to focus, poor health... I’ll stop there before I sound like google and inform you of the 1, 000 082 possible ways to die. 

We know anxiety surrounds us, but how do we really relieve ourselves from it's glum and health-impacting shadow? 

• Courage and honesty people!Courage to face what you fear. 
• Honesty to go after what you need and say no to what you don’t. 

Ignoring our problems and things that scare us doesn’t make them go away, in fact, all we succeed in doing is turning them into fast-growing, resilient weeds that feed on our passion and happiness. 

There really is only one solution when we want to turn our minds and hearts into happily flourishing weed-free gardens...and that is to stand firm and live your truth. 

Even if your truth upsets others.
Even if living your truth scares you.
Even if protecting your truth results in conflict and change.
Live. Your. Truth.

When you bravely put yourself first - on every level - you will not only see the change but feel it. And that’s where the magic is, the beautiful feelings of peace, acceptance, worth, and love.

I got to experience two enchanting, anxiety-free nights and I highly recommend it. I have felt stress slowly make its way back into my life but after tasting nirvana, I can promise you, and myself, to be vigilant in my anxiety-deletion-practice.

Go out there and be brave